A Week in Limbo

I arrived home last Sunday and knew I was leaving Saturday. It’s always an awkward adjustment when you already know you leave so soon. I don’t feel home, but I don’t feel anywhere else. It is strange, off-putting and probably a huge reason why I never got around to grocery shoppin

While I ate delivery or take out basically every night (and one night I just ate a bag of potato chips), I still tried to prioritize me and grabbed a few moments before racing begins, and I lose nearly all resemblance of a private, ‘normal’ life.

Every morning, even if I was waking up at 6:15 am, I stayed in bed for a few extras moments to simply enjoy it. While I get to stay in some lovely hotels, nowhere is as good as my own bed. So, I’d stay in bed and read through the news, a quick glance at Instagram, journal and then do a 10-minute Headspace meditation session. Grabbing this me time meant I felt centered and calm before checking my email and the craziness began. I also tried to work out daily.

The Roommate strongly encouraged (left cash on the table before he left) getting a massage. A new place opened near the apartment, so I had no excuse. I escaped over lunch and had one of the best sports massages in years. It was one of those grit your teeth, but it felt so good types of massages. I spend a lot of time folded into small airplane seats, driving a car or sitting in front of a computer. My body and head are better when I get into a routine of body work, and I’m going to try and prioritize a monthly massage. Biweekly if I’m home. 

I even made it to the movies one night with a girlfriend and saw LaLaLand. I liked it, truly enjoyed certain moments, but it wasn’t the best thing I’d ever seen.

The week was full gas, full gas, full gas. I was working 12-15 hour days all week, so on Saturday; I tried to get basic life back in order before hitting the road that afternoon. Trash, downloading movies, paying bills and cleaning up for when the roommate passes back through.

I'm in route to Dubai--a wonderful race with great weather, an amazing hotel, and a solid race buffet. I like starting the season this way.

The Night I ate Potato Chips for Dinner and Other Musings

It's been that kind of week. It's actually been that kind of month but for two weeks of it, I was at training camp in a nice hotel where there was a healthy, tasty buffet with a good variety of foods and someone to give me fresh laundry and clean towels every day. Having someone else handle all the basic necessities in life meant I could handle working all day and still smoothly flow through the day.

It's a bit pathetic, but I never went to the grocery store this week. I have worked 12-15 days and I just didn't have the time nor the effort. If I was going to have a little bit of free time, I was either working out or wanted to have some normal, social time.  (I got to grab a movie this week and it felt amazing to just go sit in a theatre. So normal!)

• Tuesday night: Deliveroo from a Korean place. Bibimbap and rice with kimchi. It was good but cost more than I thought it deserved. But super fresh and if I didn't care about price, a win.
• Wednesday night: Frozen "carrot noodle" soup buried in the depths of the freezer. Also sustained me over lunches. Eggs of served as breakfast. I was smart enough to grab a dozen of fresh ones when I got home.
• Thursday night: a 1/2 a bag of Walker's Deli Modena balsamic potato chips. I loved them and I'm a little ashamed of that. I did sneak in some (defrosted) frozen peas as I headed to bed because otherwise, life seemed to be going off the rails.
• Friday night: Takeout from Le Botaniste. I learned my lesson from the overpriced Korean place and could use the extra steps, so I decided to walk and get take out. It was heavenly. Organic. Vegan. Gluten-free. And I have a few leftovers for tomorrow's lunch.

It was a crazy week. And the start of many crazy weeks. Probably six months worth of crazy weeks. I decided on Tuesday that if I am going to handle this, I need to outsource the things I can. Someone else might need to cook my food, (still in a healthy way) and that's one option that I can choose to relieve some stress. Maybe my next month will be a maid? 

Holiday Dining Standouts

Warning: this is a post about sheer decadence. Instead of exchanging gifts this year, the Roommate and I decided to dine at four fancy restaurants. We'd reached this decision after walking around town recently and seeing there were so many places we'd never eaten at but always said we wanted to.

**I attempted to be gluten and dairy free where possible....but I definitely wasn't even close to 75%.

So now was the time to make it a priority while we were both in town and with the holidays as a good excuse for celebrating. Also, we never take for granted how long we are living in Belgium and never know if it could be our last holiday season here.

Naturell

It was our first time at Naturell, which pitches itself as an "all senses" cuisine. The video above of our first starter gives you a little glimpse at what they mean. Fantastic! We had let them know that one of us was gluten and dairy-free and they did a wonderful job accommodating the request. After a fantastic multi-course menu, we left already eager to return.

Carte Blanche

Carte Blanche is well reviewed in Gent and it was the only place we could get a reservation on Christmas Eve. I'm not sure if it was their first time hosting a Christmas Eve multi-course menu but there were definitely a few hiccups during the night. I wasn't as wow'ed as I wanted to be.

Karel De Stoute

This was our second time eating here and like our first experience, I was so impressed. The biggest thing to note is that they do a full gluten-free and dairy-free tasting menu for me. I greatly appreciate this and felt so spoiled. Also, they were by far the best-priced place that we ate at. If I could dine here once a week, I would. I'd say they are my favorite restaurant in Gent.

Pakhuis

Pakhuis is an old standard for us; any time we have guests in town or simply want a good cocktail, we go to Pakhuis. The food (particularly the Poulet de Bresse) is always top-notch and the interior is unique and impressive. We went here for New Year's Eve and unfortunately I came down with a stomach bug right after arriving. I managed to make it through most of the meal but didn't really eat or drink. I was sad that I couldn't enjoy it because it all looked wonderful. I was home and in pajamas before midnight. No champagne toast for me.

Favorite dishes

• Appetizer: Bonemarrow at Janine's (restaurant not listed above)
• Vegetarian course: Carrot, Pumpkin, Kale - Naturell
• Fish course: Soft Shell Crab-Karel de Stoute
• Meat course: Hare two ways - Karel de Stoute
• Dessert: Yuzu and black ride - Naturell

And now the dieting begins. To be honest, there were a few kilos gained throughout this holiday season that I'm not looking to keep with me too long into 2017.

Day in the Life: Christmas Edition

I don't think I remember how different Christmas Day is for me in Belgium until it happens. As a kid, I grew up with the super traditional Christmas where everyone went into the living room together, opened gifts and ate breakfast. Now that I have nieces and nephews, the tradition continues with the big difference now that I do it with a mimosa in hand. Yet my last American Christmas was five years ago. 

In Belgium, it is very different, very quiet. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy it. I love where I am in life right now and I appreciate these moments. Yet, glancing through everyone's Instagram stories and seeing American Christmas, I felt nostalgic. Every year, the quietness catches me off-guard and makes me miss spending time with my bigger family. 

Here is a glimpse at my expat Christmas:

1am: A nice walk home from Christmas Eve dinner at Carte Blanche. We left around 12:30am and stepped outside into a fairly warm Belgian evening. We walked the long way home along the canal to check out the boats. Then crawled into bed full, happy, and content. 

8am: Woke up and remembered it was Christmas morning. My bed was so warm and cozy so I decided to doze a little longer.

9am: Spent awhile in bed catching up on instagram and Facebook and reading through Flipboard. 

10am: Tried talking the roommate into bringing me coffee in bed. Total failure. That guy can sleep so late, it's almost impressive.

10:30am: Major Christmas fail! Went out to make coffees and learned we only had one pod for the coffee machine and were totally out of milk. It was comical and sad all at the same time. So instead I made a little Christmas breakfast. Neither of us were super hungry yet, so a few eggs and fresh fruit. But to make the eggs special, I cooked them in a little foie gras. Amazing.

1:30pm: After some lazy TV time, we bundled up and headed outside. What was supposed to be a little stroll turned into a nearly 15km hike around town. 

3:00pm: Before returning home, we swung by the neighborhood kerstmis chalet and grabbed two little glühweins to warm up and celebrate the day.

3:30pm: I took a nice long bath followed by a 30-minute nap. It felt so incredibly luxurious. 

5:30pm: A little pre-dinner spread of pate, wagyu beef bresaola, gluten free crackers and more berries.

6:45pm: Headed out into a rainy Belgian evening to meet our Christmas dinner dining companions. Four of us expats got together and did all-you-can-eat ribs for dinner because that's obviously what you do for Christmas. 

10:15pm: It was such a fun evening of laughs and stories. It was a great group to spend the holidays with but sadly, the roommate was feeling under the weather (and woke up this morning downright sick....) by the end. We were home and asleep by 11pm. And no, we didn't have the chocolademousse van de huis.

Snapshots from a Day in my Life

Instead of writing another post about my foot, I figured a day of photos might be slightly more entertaining. Another low-key, maybe even a little boring day, while I focus on recovering and building back up energy for some upcoming travel.

Little cold in the apartment when I woke up. A hoodie and cup of coffee asap.

Breakfast of fruit, yogurt and a little sunflower butter.

Morning of work, mainly prepping for my upcoming trips to Japan and China.

Lunchtime yoga session.

Quick FieldDay Coconut Bar counted as my lunch I headed out the door for physical therapy.

The walk to and from physical therapy served as my workout for the day. No crutches and only a boot felt like a major success!

Session of someone bending my toe back and forth. I'm not a real fan of this physical therapy. Put simply, it hurts and is boring.

Finally headed for a MUCH, MUCH needed haircut (it's been five months!)

First Belgian haircut in probably four years. I've been too scarred from the last hack job. I was very pleased by this trim and minor addition of side bangs.

Mailed my absentee ballot in before the deadline.

Fantastic dinner of chicken, avocado, bacon sandwich on gluten-free bread with a chipotle mayo. Side of homemade oven cooked fries and a organic tomato soup (which I was too full to eat).

I'll dream of this awesome sandwich for awhile. Perfection.

Spoiled by Volta

When I found out I was going to need surgery (fairly unexpectedly and with very short notice), I threw all caution to the wind and went out for an extravagant dinner at Volta that same evening. I figured I couldn't take anything for granted (maybe slightly dramatic) and loads of delicious food was on my bucket list. Out went all my dietary restrictions and beliefs that calories mattered and in came a multi-course meal that was just what I needed before being bedridden for days, and days, and days....

I've wanted to eat at Volta ever since moving to Gent and maybe even a little before that. It's set in an incredible building situated along one of the city's park. The chef always gets great reviews and my doctor's office happened to be right around the corner, so it seemed like the right time to let them indulge us.

Three amuse-bouches to start - the mussels were one of the best bites of the evening - and several decadent courses followed. My favorite was by far the wild duck with foie gras. A delicious fruit dessert and then, I said yes to the cheese cart. A round of post-meal amuse-bouches concluded the eating and then an espresso to finish it all off. We had memorable wines paired throughout the meal. I would say that Volta is now, without a hint of a doubt, my favorite high-end restaurant in Gent. It was a wonderful experience from start to finish, with attentive and friendly waitstaff, super interesting decor and fantastic food.

It concluded with a nice long walk home to work off some of the delicious food and enjoy the fact I could still walk for a few more days.

Tips for Handling Expat Loneliness

I spend a lot of time alone in a foreign country. When I haven't been traveling for work, much of the last five years has been spent alone in Belgium. It is easy to romanticize living in a foreign country - all the great cafes, amazing new foods and incredible sights - but all of that is actually what you enjoy when you are on vacation. Life isn't quite the same when you are living there.

When you live in a foreign country, everyday life becomes more of a battleground. I've spoken about this aspect before (Solo Living and Forgetting Independence Day) but a bigger challenge for me can often be loneliness.

For much of this past July and August, I lived out of a suitcase. I actually thrive living this way: sleeping in hotels and spending time on airplanes. There is a sense of routine to this lifestyle that I embrace.

I've been home for almost a month and it has taken some adjusting. Work has been exceptionally light, which I appreciate, but that means I have much more time to fill. In the past, when I would wake up during times like these, I would feel overwhelmed with how much of the day I had to occupy. You can only read, work out and wander so much. And I shouldn't start drinking booze solo every day by 3pm.

The first few days of getting home after a long haul are all about recovery, but once you've slept as much as you can, now you have to start entertaining yourself. Over the years, these are the habits I've picked up to fill my day:

• Meditating: I try to meditate for at least 10 minutes every morning. I use Headspace and it's a nice way to set the tone for the day.
• Journaling: I write in the mornings and the evenings for maybe two minutes each time. It helps me reflect on the positive things.
• Talking: There have been many times where I think I haven't spoken out loud to someone all day long. This can't be good, so I try to speak to people as much as possible when I'm out.
• Get Out: I head to a cafe, grocery store or shop every single day. Working from home has its benefits, but for me, it can quickly turn me into a hermit. I force myself to go on some adventure every day.
• Dutch: Learning the language has definitely helped me feel more comfortable living here. While my schedule isn't consistent enough to allow me to take traditional classes anymore, now I make myself do Rosette Stone for an hour five days a week. Once I finish the 12th unit (the entire set), I'll write a review on if it is worth it.
• Playing Music: From the moment I'm awake until the evening, I have music on at all times. Silence contributes to loneliness, so playing great tunes really helps.
• Working Out: I have no excuse not to. I walk a lot right now, but in the winter, I'll probably start swimming again more. When it comes to walking, I try to map out different routines or come up with a destination to make it more exciting.
• Podcast: This almost makes me feel pathetic saying, but listening to podcast makes me feel like I'm with friends. Maybe it's a one-sided conversation, but it gives me a sense of interaction. Currently, my favorite podcast are: Tim Ferriss, Jess Lively--The Lively Show, and obviously This American Life.
• Making Good Food: This is a task I used to fail at majorly. I saw the times I was home as the best ways to save money and maybe shed a pound or two. This meant I was eating lots of eggs and as basic and simple as possible. It brought me zero joy. I now plan out meals and make every meal of my day an event. Sure, it means more dishes and it cost more, but one thing I have right now is time.
• Talking with Friends: Most of my friends are six hours or more behind me in time. This means my mornings are particularly quiet without many texts or social media updates coming through. But by lunch onwards, my world begins to come alive. I try to text or call with friends frequently. Google voice and Whatsapp are life savers when it comes to this.
• Yoga: This is partly because I can feel my body getting older and stiffer, but it is also something I do towards the end of my day to slow things down and transition into bedtime with some flexibility yoga. It helps make crawling into bed solo not so strange.
• Save TV: Even with my free time right now, I try not to turn on the TV, except maybe when I'm eating lunch. Instead, I wait until the evening to enjoy TV. It also makes the evening feel a little different and gives me something to look forward to. Belgium got Netflix back in November/December of last year and it's been a game changer. I don't even need cable otherwise (but watching it does help with my Dutch).
• Dog Walking: When all else fails or if I'm feeling especially lonely, I go walk a dog. The Gent animal shelter has volunteer dog walking. Spending time with a dog puts a smile on everyone's face.

Day in the Life: Solo Weekend at Home

I feel like no one day is the same in my life--it doesn't matter if I'm at a race or at home--it always comes with a great deal of fluctuation. When I'm at home on the weekends, I could still be covering a race remotely, the Roommate could be in town or I am flying solo with a fairly wide open weekend. This past weekend was the latter and I absolutely loved it. Here is a quick recap of my Sunday:

8:45am--Woke up without my alarm. Still listening to my body and letting it sleep as much as it wants to recover from all the travel and the hard season. I am a morning person by nature, so sometimes my heart jumps when I see how late it is. Immediately after waking up, I did a 10-minute Headspace session. I go in and out of consistency with mediating, yet I always believe it's an add. Then I did some quick journaling, something I've been fairly consistent with for a few years now. Finally, I headed into the kitchen and made some coffee. 

9:15am--After catching up on some blogs, I hopped in the shower. The sun was shining and I wanted to get outside. On Sundays in Belgium, lots and lots of places are closed. I searched on my phone to see if the organic market was opened and I was surprised to see it was.

10:00am--Out the door and heading for the market. Before shopping, I enjoyed an espresso and a juice with ginger, spinach and a few other things. Then I just wandered around aimlessly. I came home with zucchini, squash, cherry tomatoes, heirloom tomatoes, rainbow chard, cauliflower, cucumbers and fresh eggs.

10:45am--With it so sunny, I just wandered around town for a bit. I wanted to see where was opened and I just enjoy getting a little lost.

11:30am--Swung my Delhaize, my real grocery store, and got the other things I need for the next few days. I hit the road again on Saturday.

12:15pm--Headed home and dropped off my groceries. A few emails had come in while I was out, so I tackled those.

1:15pm--I'm going back to the States on Saturday for a wedding and I see this as an opportunity to utilize the US mail system. So much cheaper than mailing things internationally! Many friends have had babies recently and I want to send them a little something from Belgium, so I went to my favorite linen and lace shop and grabbed some gifts to mail when I get to New York.

3:00pm--Decided it was wine time and sat outside at my neighborhood bar with a crisp glass of white wine.

4:10pm--After going home and changing, I headed to a canal to fish. Such a strange hobby for a female, I know. Despite trying three different places, the fish simply weren't biting.

5:45pm--Discouraged, I headed home.

6:10pm--Sat outside on my patio and did some reading.

7:30pm--Dinner for one. Zucchini noodles with tomato sauce, ground beef, pickled red onions and a bunch of basil.

8:10pm--Watched a very brainless movie on Netflix (Mono) which left me feeling stupider than when I started it. I didn't finish it.

9:45pm--Climbed into bed. I did a little more journaling, caught up on social media and then watched trashy reality TV (Real Housewives of New York). Probably fell asleep a little after 11pm.

Solo Living in a Foreign Country

After nearly five years I've adjusted to being alone in a foreign country, but when I first arrived, loneliness and fear were nearly debilitating. If I let my mind start running, I could come up with a million problems where the solution would be crazy impossible to solve. Even now, knowing that you don't have anyone to fall back on, or even someone to problem solve with, gets excruciatingly scary.

A quick throwback to the time the door handle broke while I was inside.... about a month into moving to Belgium. The closest human I knew was in Qatar.  I was trapped.

Despite having a Roommate, I spend the vast majority of my time alone in Belgium. Sure, I have a few friends that would help me out, but most of my support group is located thousands of miles away. With time zone differences, simply talking to my friends gets challenging.

Getting out and enjoying this city is one of my daily aims, especially when the sun is shining.

Fortunately, my Dutch language skills are strong enough where basic interactions are  easy, but that wasn't always the case. I moved to a small town in Belgium during a particularly miserable winter without any knowledge of Dutch, friends or the area. The first few months were insanely lonely...insanely lonely. Eventually, I forced myself to make friends and went to Dutch classes. Both of those things, particularly the classes, really helped make the transition from being scared to being okay.

Cooking full and complete meals, even if they are only for me, helps with feeling more normal and adjusted to life here. I look forward to grocery shopping and excited about what I can make, even if I'm not sharing. Obviously, Mexican is one of my most common themes.

Now I live in a much larger city, which helps, but I still have to tackle things solo. When you live in a foreign country, simple tasks can get tough...like the time I forgot it was Belgium Independence Day. I tend to be a regular at cafes where I feel comfortable dining solo. Over the years, I have actually grown to enjoy going to the movies solo; it now feels like a treat.

Getting out and exploring, typically by foot, is one of my favorite workouts and ways to see the city. 

With my new fishing obsession (actually not new... I've fished since childhood), this week I'm pushing myself to go to the bait and tackle store solo. I think my hangup on this issue is the fact I'm female. I know it's a little strange, and I'll get looked at for buying worms and heading out to parks to fish solo...yet I don't want to stop my hobby. Typically, beating to my own drum is my theme....yet being a lonely foreigner in a strange country...it can get a little too hard.

Nothing like being the only female in the store...and then one speaking a funny foreign language. It's a little more attention than I like to attract.

Over the past few years, I've embraced this feeling of tackling a challenge. I think I almost thrive feeling a little awkward and uncomfortable. I also think that is absolutely vital to my success here. I feel fortunate and so lucky to be on this adventure and every day I remind myself that I don't want to look back and feel I missed out on something because I was scared. Even at times when I'm solo, I want to live this crazy experience as largely as possible.

Day in the Life: GP Stad Zottegem

One-day small Belgian races come with a huge, huge benefit---sleeping at home! I've had two races this week, GP Jef Scherens in Leuven and then GP Stad Zottegem in.... Zottegem. Both were within an hour's train ride, so I got to wake up and sleep at my apartment both days. After my previous month and a half of travel, I don't take days at home for granted. If I didn't live so close, I probably wouldn't attend these races for work, but I can't have my guys racing so closely and not support them. Here's a quick glimpse at my day:

8:00am--Wake up. I know.....it's nothing short of shameful but after all the jet lag, I just try to listen to my body. Shower and check the weather for the day. At Sunday's race, it was cold and raining. I wore basically all the gear I owned, but today is looking like a gorgeous summer day. Shorts, tank top and sandals!

8:30am--Check email, double check trains, drink coffee and throw in some laundry. This whole sleeping at home thing is awesome.  

9:20am--Out the door. It is already HOT, so I grab the tram to the train station. I want to delay the wet dog look.

9:50am--Soy latte and egg sandwich from Starbucks. The sandwich said it had an egg and some spinach, so I was planning on just throwing out the bread. The spinach was instead blended with cheese. Total bust in my gluten-free, dairy-free life.

10:05am--Train to Zottegem. It's delayed 10 minutes.  Lots of funny sounds and shaking, so I'm a little concerned we are never going to make it. Because it is such a low-key race, I'm not terribly concerned about my arrival time.

10:30am--Did some work on the train. I know this is one of the quietest moments of my day and one where I can sit with my computer and decent Internet and crank through some things.

10:50am--Arrive in Zottegem. I have about a 1.5-kilometer walk from the train station to the race start. The heat has really started to crank up.

11:05am--Arrive at the race. I have a few things I need to do before the guys leave for the start, including shoot a few videos. Always a juggling act between getting work done, supporting our sponsors and letting an athlete mentally prepare for competition. Also, there are numerous kid fans on-site, so I try give them a VIP, super memorable experience with the team. I always think that it is our one shot with these kids, our one opportunity to make a lifelong memory and I'm always driven to make it the best it can be. Before I know it, the riders are heading out for the start.

1:00pm--I find a cute restaurant to grab as much water as possible and lunch. I order what ended up being an impressive chicken salad....enough for several people. And because I am in Belgium, I obviously got fries on the side.... with mayonnaise.

2:30pm--The heat is now basically unbearable ...around 34C (100F), so I find someone's shaded front porch that is along race course. I hunker down, find decent Wifi and work until the race finishes. I mainly respond to emails, edit videos and fight with Wifi to get things uploaded.

5:00pm--Waiting for the race to finish. I start looking at my phone and hoping to get an earlyish train back to Gent. It looks like I have a little wait, but hopefully I can make it home by 7pm. I'm dreaming of a normal night at home, cooking my own food and taking it easy....maybe watching a movie.

7:15pm--The Roommate picks me up at the train station. He breaks the news that he has one of his sponsors in town (he works for a different team) and asks if I want to have dinner and drinks out with them. My dream of a salad and a night on the sofa quickly disappears.

7:45pm--A super quick rinse to get the layer of yuck from the day in the sun off and I'm out the door again. A glass of cava at the neighbourhood bar and then Indian for dinner. Despite my earlier hesitations, it isn't so bad.

9:45pm--I'm crawling into bed; I'm definitely dehydrated, but all in all, a good day.

An Expat Ode

I've felt it several times today: as I walked out of my apartment, located in the heart of the city, and again this evening sitting outside at my local 'Cheers'. This is home. 

I'm conflicted if I should feel insanely lucky or overwhelmingly proud. Maybe both. The fact I pulled off legally living in Europe without a sponsor and without any family lineage to rely on is nothing to sneeze at. In actuality, I was told it was impossible.

Yet, I'm sitting in a position of reapplying for my visa for the last time. That's because soon I can apply to be a citizen of this strange, small and wonderful country in a matter of months. 

I did this; it was all me. Not a single person helped make this happen, but I will give some credit to that one person who has been my Roommate through it all. Yet, no one held my hand. No one guided the way. I know no one else that has done it, so I couldn't learn from their successes or failures. There were no books on how to thrive in this foreign country, especially with no work and no friends initially, and trying to extricate myself gracefully from an already failed marriage.

It feels possibly like my greatest achievement. This strange, historic city feels more like home than anywhere I've lived in the States. Sure, I'm always the foreigner, but when I sit in my neighborhood cafe and listen to the sounds and watch the people, I feel so at ease. 

Thanks Belgium for taking me in.

Traveling Adventures: Mixing in the Family

I consider myself a professional traveler. I spend at least 170 days a year in hotels, airplanes and on the move between work and some personal travel. After several years, you find a rhythm that allows you to excel in the movement. You learn to pack your suitcase a certain way so you notice if something were missing and aim to keep it as light as possible. This comes with all sorts of tips and tricks, especially as a female who enjoys looking fairly decent while typically not having access to laundry facilities.

When I travel with other people, they usually are coworkers or friends who also travel constantly. We all know how to do it fairly seamlessly. But then there are the trips where you travel with complete rookies, and that isn't always so easy. Earlier this month, I had the joy of traveling with my 70-year-old mother and 13-year-old nephew. It was a span of generations, energy levels and interests. I served as the de facto tour guide and planner, which was a role I think I both excelled and failed at in equal portions.

It's a juggle and an adjustment; one I might not always handle with grace. When you live on the road, you learn that the little details count. You double check for your cell phone or keys. You problem solve all day long and lean on others to assist with problems and logistical details. These details didn't come as second nature for my travel companions. It felt like they were scattering backpacks, cell phones, books, apartment keys and jackets across Europe. It was both amusing and worrisome.

But all the troubles didn't fall on their shoulders. Unfairly, I expected them to slot in and help with details like reading a map to detour around a bike race, assist with navigating around the Champs-Élysées traffic circle from hell, searching for a gas station hidden in the belly of Paris' underground or being on the lookout for a parking spot in a crowded city. In the moment, I wasn't always able to understand why they couldn't have better travel skills. My annoyance and frustration weren't always well hidden, which maybe wasn't my finest showing. 

My work life comes with a daily schedule. We get told what time to get up, when to eat breakfast, what time to pack our bags out, what time to depart, etc. etc. We receive this information the evening before and every day basically has the same flow. When I'm home by myself, I'm crave not having a set day. Yet, this trip was a strange mix of travel but on personal time. It needed both flow and structure. Being the pseudo-local, that fell on me.

While I didn't always want to plan, it did mean that I got to see Europe through a whole new set of eyes. While I won't be a mother, I do have the opportunity to be an amazing aunt. And that experience was quite rewarding. My mom has been to Europe several times, but it was the first time my nephew had been on an airplane, left the country (and maybe tasted some bubbles). It was thrilling to show him different cultures and to walk back through history with him.

It was also fantastic just getting to spend time with my nephew. It sometimes amazes me that I've known this human his whole life. And now he is old enough to be exploring Europe and letting me sneak sips of wine during a fancy meal. It gets me excited about who he will become and the adventures we get to have as he grows.

Hopefully this was just the first of many travel adventures he and I will get to have again. I love showing him that the world is so accessible. Now I just need to wait until my niece is old enough to bring over, but I know she'll be the one running circles around me. She's already a little spitfire.